A chapter in RSY’s life

A chapter in RSY’s life
A state of equlibrium, jaded and yet contented-Learnt how to fly and fell, now I realised I never wanted to fly that much-Just like how I don't need things I used to think I cannot live without

I thought wrong … why the void within?

June 20th, 2006

Went for a haircut after work yesterday, cos my hair was getting way too messy. Wanted a new look, thought it will give me a more refreshed feeling and perk up my mundane life slightly. It's like totally short at the back, a straight bob cut back view, but from the front it's like layered shoulder length hair. Went back home to colour my hair red myself (the new hair was blatantly not a good combi with my previous colour done in Feb) and everything turned out the way I wanted it. Yet I feel dis-satisfied. Uncontented in a way …

Met my ex-colleagues before my haircut for coffee, felt kinda sad that things ain that rosy for most of them. Feel detached yet attached to the bank, it doesn't feel as endearing like when I first left. Yet I do miss that kinda life, play hard when playing, work smart & hard when you have to. That's just so me. Not that I am complaining that I don't enjoy my current designation, it's super relaxed and definitely good for me to take a break. Just that, I still prefer to "chiong", it gives me a purpose in life. Now I am just like monotonously coming to work in the morning and going home when I am free to do so. Can't feel the pressure nor that adrenaline rush, feels empty and lack of confidence. Really.

Maybe that's why I indulge in my games, at least inside that realm I have a direction.

Maybe I am just PMS-ing. *lol*

Ever the same - Rob Thomas

June 6th, 2006

We were drawn from the weeds
We were brave like soldiers
Falling down under the pale moonlight
You were holding me
Like a someone broken
And I couldn’t tell you, but I’m telling you now

Just let me hold you while you’re falling apart
Just let me hold you and we’ll both fall down

Fall on me
Tell me everything you want me to be
Forever with you, forever in me
Ever the same

We would stand in the wind
We were free like water
Flowing down
Under the warmth of the sun
Now it’s cold and we’re scared
And we’ve both been shaken
Hey, look at us man
This doesn’t need to be the end

Just let me hold you while you’re falling apart
Just let me hold you and we’ll both fall down

Fall on me tell me everything you want me to be
Forever with you
Forever in me
Ever the same
Call on me
And I’ll be there for you and you’ll be there for me
Forever it’s you
Forever in me
Ever the same

You may need me there
To carry all your weight
But you’re no burden I assure
You tide me over
With a warmth I’ll not forget
But I can only
give you love

Fall on me tell me everything you want me to be
Forever with you
Forever in me
Ever the same
Call on me
I’ll be there for you and you’ll be there for me
Forever it’s you
Forever in me
Ever the same
Forever with you
Forever in me
Ever the same
Ever the same

@%#%&^! Morning Cab Driver

May 30th, 2006

Yah shouldn’t be taking a cab in the morning but couldn’t sleep after I woke up at 3 am plus last nite (Morning early morning) and gamed all the way till it was time to go for work. Pretty shagged by then, so pretty much peeved at the ti ko cab driver that I got.

Told him my destination, then he look stunned and then said in Mandarin (translated),
“Paiseh arh, you too pretty that I lost my thoughts for a moment…” DIAONG!
Then I thanked him but thru out the trip he keep saying it and repeating it and then saying he has no chance one he knows, he just feels I am pretty… DOUBLE DIAONG!
Then I tried to avoid the conversation and started smsing and calling people, I put down the phone he say I like very busy like that so many smses and phonecall, not even giving him a chance to talk to me. TRIPLE DIAONG!

Anyway pretty relaxed day at work… and yes I should be sleeping I ALSO WANT! Damn freako mosquitoes keeping me awake…. ARGH! I heard neighbours complained to town council to do something about it. OBVIOUSLY nothing has been done. Tmd. Frustrated and gaming isn’t helping or maybe it’s just the facts that hurts.

Worth it not worth it?

May 20th, 2006

Worth it or not worth it?

Relationships that are worth it and not worth it … sometimes you reach a limit to giving or tolerating. Redeeming factors of someone close will make you feel better when you laugh and joke together or have fun together. But how to remind yourself when it gets taken for granted and the same issues that made you upset comes up again? Sometimes I feel that I am the person who is taken for granted and sometimes I am the person taking things for granted. But life is such isn’t it?

It doesn’t pay to be kind anyway. Not to all. Just to some who really matters, those who really plays a part.

Monday officially back to workforce, feeling DAMN SIAN….. cos hafta work le :(Anyway for the uninitiated about the “Hooooo!”, “Say say say!” and “Okaaaay!”, below are the links with english subtitles for Hardo Gay!

Hard Gay @ Yahoo! Japan
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjjvUO4xxlQ

Hard Gay Ramen
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-aiHJgvlTu4

Hard Gay Father’s Day
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mFKpriH8s0g

Hard Gay TOMY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XfBHJsI2OpI - Part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f6keevgU6-M - Part 2

Hard Gay Sakura Viewing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSKvUtEgAxU

Hard Gay The Television
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dg-3FZMnNkY - Part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDJVEVxBe98 - Part 2

Hard Gay Cupid
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukUenjyPXQU - Part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdWgOtJkOl4 - Part 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1duOzmQRR8 - Part 3

A conversation, a dialogue, a stupefaction …

April 22nd, 2006

I had heard about how insolent they were, how ignorant their questions were BUT I never expected it to be this bad. Here’s for those who haven’t watched.


Being a first time voter myself (if it’s not a walkover), I wanted very much to watch this supposed to be interesting dialogue. Greatly disappointed in fact, with 7 journalists in the panel (1 being slammed and slapped in the face), there were little constructive questions throughout the whole session. And in fact I think it was a shocking revelation for Mr MM, in terms of of the education system that is in place today. Undergrads, or grads bringing out a “fear” of voting against the PAP, when there’s absolutely no way you can tell Mr Lim Ah Kow, or Mr Tan Ah Beng voted against the PAP. (Thanks Matilda for bringing that up earlier on, I improvised the characters *lol*)There are many bloggers who have already touched on how unhappy they are with the choice of the panel, the misrepresentation of us post-1965ers (a new term I learnt while googling for the dialogue video!) in their immature questions, the constant interrupting of others who are speaking etc. I can’t even describe how disgraced I feel when CNA broadcast this to other countries, and what other people in these countries see of our generation. But I don’t want to dwell on the number of times I frowned, raised an eyebrow, shake my head, went “HUH?!” in front of my PC when I watched the dialogue TWICE.The only “fruits” from the dialogue was finding out about the 1955 elections, how PAP fought its way to a major presence in parliament from just 3 seats in parliament that year. Mr LKY touched on how opposition parties can gain more support and getting more qualified candidates to run for elections. Own experience (even if it’s in a different era). Respect!

The coffee session earlier with my girls about the political scene (yes my girls are intellectual ok?) was enlightening. Not with facts alone, with mature thoughts and thinking. At least the education did a minority good. ( Elitist!) True enough, Mr LKY did a lot for our country and I believe it’s impossible for Singapore to have done so well in such a short period of time without him. His name is reknown, it gives a face to this little red dot on the global map. I applaud him for what he has done so far. However I think we do need to look back on what has been built in this nation for the past 40 years and fine tune it further. Especially the education system. (Didn’t manage to touch much on this during my coffee session)

We are a KBE that relies so much on human resources/creative ideas to survive and I don’t think the education system is doing enough to achieve that. I think the dialogue is a (disappointing) reflection of how narrow-minded some of the higher educated individuals are today. Thinking out of the box, really pursuing their passion, to let their creativity flow, stepping up to the plate to do something different. I am not saying the education sucks, I am saying there should be less emphasis on just that paper, more focus on brainpower. Like Mr LKY at 82, his memory is not failing, his questioning is methodlogical, totally convinced why he is MM still. The best assets of our economy is us. I think there can still be betterment in our education system honestly, more fields of specialisation in our universities….

And of course the support for SOHOs, SMEs (which there is currently Spring to do that), there should be more attention given to this essential part of support for this generation.

I am still reading up the elections history even though I am still astounded by the vid. I think we still have so much more we can talk about. I am not apolitical definitely, but I am comfortable still. Don’t feel a need for a change currently not because I am ignorant, but because I cherish what I have today and I do care what happens in the future. But the times are moving faster, there will be more tests for governments of the world, not just Singapore. So may the best candidate win! 你有料你赢 lor!

Chapter Finale

April 21st, 2006

“Dearest Mr Eeeyore,

Already made me cold, and made me feel that this isn’t gonna work out between us. What you said and did today sorta made it even more obvious that I shouldn’t care that much. After all, we are just great buddies who are supposed to wait for each other at the end of tunnel to go into the light together. In fact, I never expected much from showering you with care and concern. Being by your side when you needed me was more than enough. But asking me for dinner and then making me wait with my friends for you is entirely hurtful. I tried delaying us leaving that place, but I felt really bad making all of them wait together with me for your arrival. I would have waited if I was alone, then again when I think back, I have no reason to do so. I somewhat realised you have taken a lot of things for granted and unfortunately, my patience has ran out for your wilfulness.

I ain gonna sms/call you, if you do I will see how.

Not that stupid,
DTY”

That’s what I wrote in a forum. Utter disappointment and sheer heartbreak in fact using the hated “whatevers” when you knew I loathed it. TWICE consecutively. Doing the very thing I told myself you wouldn’t do today. I ain a Superwoman, faith can be destroyed sometimes and you just did.

c0ffee makes me =)

April 15th, 2006

I never knew how He always make things possible. Was just contemplating whether to go to Church today and then Ms Juan and Ms Cher wanted to join me for mass! How sweet, it made me so excited about church suddenly. And I am so glad I made it for Good Friday Mass, it never fails to remind me of why I stood by my beliefs against all odds since young. It never fails to made me realise all over again, how I can stand up again despite all the murphys that had came my way. Nothing can be bad enough to strike me down. Especially when He has given me so much already, especially Ms Juan who was kneeling and standing together with me during the whole liturgy. Thanks girl, you were the miracle He gave me this Good Friday.

I have so much to smile about in my life, so don’t worry ya? Be it anyone of you just right beside me, wondering if I am reeeeally ok. I am. ^_* I will get my act together once more.

I just remembered I never googled the “fact” that iced coffee causes diabetes, as told to me by my dearest Mom. So I just did that a few minutes ago AND I got AMAZING TOTALLY OPPOSITE facts.

“Researchers say the results suggest that caffeine as well as other elements in coffee may work separately as well as together in lowering the risk of type 2 diabetes by preventing insulin resistance.”

A new study of coffee and diabetes (Jan 2004) has shown that men who drank 6 cups of coffee a day reduced their chances of developing type-2 diabetes by half, and women who drank the same amount cut their risk by 30 percent. 126,000 people …

“This is good news for coffee drinkers, however it doesn’t mean everyone should run out for a latté,”

I was actually about to do that, BUT where to get a latté at 4:50 A.M in the morning? I can only get Kopi-Siu Dai at most at the Broadway Foodcourt. Tmd!

A collage done by my galpal (not just cos I am lazy, but I don’t have the pics yet) of a great night at ChinaOne on Good Friday’s Eve, live band rocks! Nothing beat old school rock…

*minimised for a little privacy

A fairly better date that made me smile today

April 11th, 2006

Yep a 2 movies and dinner date with Mr Givenchy yesterday. And moments inside his car when I was just below my block, just didn’t want the night to end. Not in the really romantic sense, just that we haven’t met in a month and 1 day. And we had so much we wanted to tell each other we had another 1 hour on the phone when he reached home. Even more glad that he suggested lunch today even though it didn’t materialise in the end.

He was gonna skip his meal again, which pains me slightly knowing how many watches he has to send for alteration cos he has lost a fair bit of weight… so I went ahead with my original plan of getting his herbal tea and then his fav MOS corn soup and burger. For that I actually took the MRT and not the bus. Noble right?

Nuff’ said about a non-existent 暧昧 relationship.

I accompanied Ms. Redbug after her exam today, we had a fruitful time shopping, she got what she had to get and I got my black durable value for $ slippers. And a super duper long and tipsy KTV session with Ms. Jo where we all sang our sad oldies and kpkb songs… Even though the cute waiter rejected my request for his number (we had a bet, the smallest roll had to ask for his number), I still really thoroughly enjoyed today. Wished I had so much fun everyday, but of cos reality does hit that I am getting more broke with enjoyment everyday. Pretty screwed already.

T.H.E.M

April 7th, 2006

This is really cool check this vid out!
These bunch of guys are amazing! Have more clips of T.H.E.M. Super cool stuff.

The interview went well, expecting a call from them soon, probably next week I will know if I am selected. Kinda excited, do hope it wouldn’t be the wrong vibes that I was getting from them. After all they are from the big corp of actors and actresses, maybe they did brush off a little talent from those around them. *lol*

Anyhow have been really glued to my com, don’t even feel like going out, my lazy arse is just stuck here and I don’t really wanna explain to my mum why my arse is not out at work. *mumbles* She has been showering TLC (which I am not complaining about), being more protective now that I am older, which is kinda strange huh? Called me at 1am to check if I was okay and coming home … felt really bad that she was worried about me though.

Was I the only one that didn’t know about Accona? The search engine by China Daily Information Company (CDIC), partners with China Communications Corp (CCC)? I feel super out of touch suddenly.

Flabbergasted!

April 5th, 2006

After an arduous games of negotiation today, I finally had the appetite to have a good meal and laugh at my la kopi sessions cos we 0wned the opponent woohoo! All thanks to a well-disguised world class negotiator, CS owe you this.

And I came home switched on the tv and found myself staring at a (imho) freaking lame variety show “Never Say Die” on Channel 8. It seems that Steven Lim finally got what he wanted, to be famous. He will be on that show every week from now on at least for 6 weeks I believe. Tickled my toes hairs to see that freako still doing the same old shit over and over again.

Gotta prep myself for that interview tomorrow, big time chance. No way I am gonna blow this, better ask for something nearer to what I want if possible. Back to gaming for now, all thanks to the guys I knew over at this co. for introducing me to DotA, my lappie is overworked again on gaming.

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